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I am not afraid of heights, but I am afraid of widths. Yup, this is a fat girl story.  I've been up and down in my weight, more up lately than down. And entering into a recession is not a good time to be fat. First, if you lose your job you'll be h... details >>>

My brother the psychologist once told me to borrow money from a pessimist, because they don't expect the money back. My problem is I only seem to know these annoying, happy optimists. Oh well. Anyway, that was a problem for me last year when I n... details >>>

There are three things about myself that I've noticed lately that say I'm not a kid anymore: My back goes out more than i do. I quit trying to hold my stomach in, no matter who walks into the room. I am proud of my lawn mower. And that's j... details >>>

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a wire clothes hanger and ignore my girlfriend's suggestions that we call a road service until long after hypothermia has set in. And because I'm a man, I held onto that "flip" p... details >>>

I saw a woman at the Metra Station wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" Both she and my wife weren't too happy about that. Oh well. I used to do stand up at open mike nights in Chicago in the 1990s, but as you might gues... details >>>